f a r e w e l l

On a seperate note...
Merry Christmas & Happy New Year to everyone!

Farewell to my good ol'....


Companion,

Partner,

Friend.


.

..

...


And I'm not talking about a person.






It's my good ol' faithful car.

(Let's just address 'him' as CJ)


Today is Christmas, and also the same day CJ is sold off to other people due to 'old age' and also due to the severe pressure from my parents. If you've noticed above, I never mentioned that CJ is merely a car or a vehicle; he's my close friend. A really close friend of mine ever since I got my driving license on the year 2001 which was like 7 years back. A trustworthy and close partner whom I dedicate most of my transportation needs' in KL / PJ for the past 7 years until I came back from Terengganu with a motorbike and finally a new car.

In fact, initially I didn't want to sell off CJ due to the fact that I can still drive around to nearby places with him. However, both my parents and (almost) all my other relatives insist to sell off CJ, saying that he is really too old (for your information, he's already 31 years old) and it will be very dangerous for me to drive such an old vehicle around hectic places, especially in KL town area. Moreover, they said that the maintenance costs are too high for CJ and it's more reasonable to buy a new vehicle than to continue wasting money on CJ's high maintenance (which kind of explains why I'm 'forced' to buy a new car). Yes, I have to admit that there's some logic in what they're saying, but still...


I just can't let him go.


There's this feeling...this 'close' feeling I have with CJ. It's like being forced to part ways with a friend you've known for 7 years, and you seriously don't like it. Seriously, if given a choice, I rather not buy the new car and stick to CJ despite all the reasons mentioned above. CJ is my best friend. Once you lose a best friend, it's not easy to get another one back asap. It's not like those Chinese saying "if the old doesn't go, the new doesn't come" kind of nonsense. It's not like if you lose something, you can go buy another new one to replace it. It's this feeling...this longing feeling to be with your friend that hinders me from letting it go...leaving him to follow a new owner who is a total stranger to myself.


And the most scary part is what the new owner is going to do with CJ after he owns CJ. Will he totally destroys CJ to gain scrap metal? Will he cuts CJ into half as part of those 'kereta potong'? Will he re-sell CJ to reckless uncle drivers'? or will he simply treat CJ as well as how I treated him all the while? I'll never know.


But in the end...


I lost the struggle.


'Thanks' to my mum, today CJ is sold off to an uncle who claims to be a second-hand car dealer. Both my parents & me went on to pass CJ to this uncle, & after negotiating the price, terms & conditions, etc, he agreed to buy CJ. And from there itself, I asked the uncle THE critical question.


"May I know what are you going to do with CJ?"


Well, his answer is kind of expected due to his occupation, but it's always safer to double-check, isn't it? So he answered me with the expected answer, nothing fancy. Let's just hope he's an honest person.

Deal done, uncle left with CJ. And what's left with me are sorrowful emotions. Yes, I'm being emotional to a non-living object, but you can't blame me. Being together with CJ for 7 years have developed a bond between both of us, and a sudden farewell like this will definitely ignite emotional breakdown. I know at times, I'm an emotional person, but I'm also a person who treasure long-lasting relationship, be it with living or non-living objects. This may sound crazy or even idiotic to some people, but this is me. Nothing will change it.

I miss you. I miss you. I miss you so, so much, CJ. I really do. And I will always remember today, the day I see you go.


I guess this is the saddest Christmas ever for me.


As always.

t h e - - c r o w d

2 posts in a day.

Something very minor & insignificant for a regular blogger, but not for a person like me. And now, today, for the 1st time, I'm posting twice on the same day.


Not too bad for a non-regular blogger.


One, I wanted to separate 2 totally different topics into 2 posts. Two, I wanted to post up this issue before I forget it by tomorrow (yes, my memory is that bad).

Back to the issue. Initially, I'm suppose to go collect the offer letter today at 9am from the Human Resource (HR) Department at my future office in Jalan Sultan Ismail, KL. And try guessing what time did I actually reach Jalan Sultan Ismail?



7.10am.



Crazy? Definitely. Idiotic? Well, part of it.


Now, you ask me, "What the heck am I going to the place so early for? Also, what am I going to do there for like, 2 hours?! "


The main reason I went to the place so freaking early is because I want to avoid the crowd. THE CROWD. For people who often take public transport to work in KL (especially LRT or Monorail), you people know what I meant by not only the usual, ordinary crowd, but THE CROWD (note the bold & caps). Some simple characteristics & stats about THE CROWD:


- Strikes most viciously at peak hours at weekdays (from 7.30am to 10am & from 5pm to 8pm), whole day on weekends & public holidays.

- Comes in various size, gender, race & origin.

- Professional & office staff are not excluded & they make up the majority of this crowd.

- Often target popular public transportation, namely Putra LRT, Star LRT, KTM Komuter & KL Monorail.

- Often (& obviously, most of them) are impolite, hostile, cuts queue better than Malaysians on the road, rushes to entrance of LRT as if that's the last freaking LRT on planet Earth while ignoring poor outgoing passengers.

- Either have ugly & smelly body odour or "outrageous" fragrance due to excessive perfume / cologne.

- Pushes stronger than The Incredible Hulk, especially when the LRT's full.

- Totally inconsiderate as elder people & pregnant ladies are left to squish together with the other "sardines in the can".


Which is why I mentioned I was only part of "idiotic" previously.

Yes, I'm so stupid to sacrifice my lovely-dovey sleep time for the sake to avoid this ugly, unbearable phenomenon happening every day at the only public transport I can take to my new workplace. Hmmm, how about alternative transportation methods, you say?


Riding my motorbike?
Yes, you can definitely avoid THE CROWD, but you can't avoid THE DANGER. Moreover, I have.....ermm, insufficient insurance. Get away, insurance agents.


Driving my car?
Yes, I can also opt to drive there, but please remember this is KL & NOT Ipoh. Traffic jam kills, and if that doesn't kill you, the parking will.

Carpooling?
Might happen, but I don't know anyone yet besides my immediate supervisor & her boss. Gosh.



Which basically leaves me with no choice besides public transport. And trust me, I feel like I'm on heaven when I hop onto an LRT with so little people & cooler air-con. What's more, with the dark skies & the silence in the morning...just what I wanted.

And also for the 2 hours' I'm there, I can always look for a mamak / food stall nearby and have a nice cuppa' tea while reading 'The Sun' free newspaper or the book 'Exit A' by Anthony Swofford which I'm currently reading.

Frankly speaking, studying in Terengganu & working in Ipoh previously have caused such a big impact to my psychology & mindset. I'm no longer the city boy I was born to be; instead I'm slowly evolving to a village boy staying in the city. I no longer love to hear the sound of exhaust pipes & look at luxurious skyscrapers; instead I long for quiet & silent beaches with less people. I no longer fancy Kopi 'O' & Frappucino's at Starbucks; instead I long for Teh 'O' & 'taugeh Chicken' more than anything else.


I guess the change is for the better good.


And I'm sure my tactic to avoid THE CROWD works so d*mn well.


Now I have to start praying hard that members' of THE CROWD doesn't read my blog. Oh well...

f i n a l l y

Finally.


.

..

...


I've got a job!

Just went to take my offer letter & also undergone my pre-employment medical checkup early this morning, and settled everything. Now what's left is to wait for the first day to report to work on next Monday (22/12/08).

Thank you very much to my friends', here online & also offline, who've supported me all the way in the process of me getting a job. Yes, you know who you are.

Really, thank you so much.

d o w n

Down.

So down.

After returning to PJ 2 weeks' back, I'm on a constant mood swing. Swinging like the unpredictable wind. Sometimes I'm good, sometimes I feel like sh*t. And trust me, most of the time, I feel like sh*t. I'm not really sure what is triggering all these emotional rundown in me, but I feel it has something to do with the job seeking process.


Yes, the job topic returns again.


I've been to several job interviews' since I came back here, some are job interview invites, some are responses to my job application online. Sad to say, not much news are heard from them ever since. Maybe they're slow in processing or simply I've failed in the interviews'. Nevertheless, I feel this 'waiting' process is dragging my self-confidence & motivation all the way down the drain. Which kind of explains the sh*tty mood swing mentioned previously.

In fact, not getting a job so quickly isn't any major thing & doesn't deserve to be highlighted so heavily. What's more, if I'm still the old 'me', I'll feel like I'm on top of the world and freedom is dancing all around me. But I'm not sure why am I feeling this...this strange feeling. This feeling, this 'fear' that I will never get a job. The feeling that I will fail in all my interviews' & end up sitting at home for the rest of my life. The feeling that I'm a sh*tty person and everything's over for me. The feeling that I'm such a loser.

Gosh, I'm so emotional. Didn't know that the change caused such a great impact on my life.

I need time to sober up before I end up scr*wing all my upcoming job interviews' due to all these mood swing.

Sorrow is upon me...again.

c h a n g e

It's been only less than a week since I'm back home in PJ, yet I feel that I have changed to a different person.


What do you mean by 'changed', you ask?


Let me explain it from an incident today which, kind of, ignite this sudden reaction.

I just got home after visiting the popular Cheras 'Hong Lok pasar malam' (for your information, 'Hong Lok' is the common name in Cantonese for this night market, which many people claim is one of the longest night market in KL). Got there with an old primary school mate & his girlfriend. That guy, let's just address him as G. G drove me to the night market, and also back home afterward. On the way back home, he passed through the Cheras highway & cut through LDP to get me back. G is driving a Perodua Myvi, and as he is driving through both highways, he's driving on a constant 130 - 140 km/h. Let me repeat that again, 130 - 140 km/h on a Myvi, Cheras highway, which coincidentally have lots of sharp corners. For the ordinary me, I would just leave G be as it is and deep inside my heart, I will run, jump & scream my @$$ out with joy as me myself love to speed like what he's doing during that time. Instead, I feel a totally different reaction during that time. I feel...


F e a r.


This feeling is something I've never felt before, all the while during my driving days in PJ / KL. As mentioned above, previously I am a speed demon myself, and I like to 'fly' my car in highways, sharp corners & what-so-ever on high speed. But just now, while G is nicely hitting the accelerator on 140 km/h, I feel fear. Fear that we might be involved in an unexpected accident (*touches wood*). During that moment, I asked G a simple question, "Wei, is it that you're driving really fast or am I getting slower ever since coming back from Ipoh?" He replied,"You're getting slower-lah! Last time I sit your car, you drive fast like this wert! "

I was stunned for a brief moment after getting the reply from G. For that particular moment, I began to start thinking whether have I changed to a different person, with a different personality & habit ever since returning from Ipoh. Come to think of it, there are really several other things besides this, that have already undergone change in myself. They might be minor changes, but they are also changes that I never, ever, expect myself to undergo.


Previously...

- I absolutely HATE eating vegetables, drinking Chinese herbal teas' (chysanthenum, bitter tea, 'luo hon guo', etc.) & tend to eat non-stop as long as my stomach still have space (which kind of explain my rapid weight gain at such a short period previously)

- I always give coins & small change to beggars/uncles/old aunty/granny/etc. when I see them as I feel that coins are useless, lowly money.

- I spend money like there's no tomorrow & don't bother to save, as I have my monthly salary to cover up my expenses.

- I tend to always talk without much thinking, which kind of offend quite a number of people.

- Ever since getting my motorcycle license, I always thought that motorcycle is better than cars in the sense that motorcycles will never need to worry about parking & PJ / KL's ugly traffic jams.


but now...

- I began to start eating vegetables, although not much, but starting off little by little. For Chinese herbal teas', I began to start enjoying it as well due to the fact that once, while in Ipoh, I got cured of a minor fever / flu, thanks to Chinese herbal teas' only and not Western medicine! Miraculous! Also, I start to take only moderate amount of food and not too much fast food as previously there are simply too many good food in Ipoh! Who needs McD's when you can have chicken rice with Ipoh beans sprout? (for your info, chicken rice with Ipoh beans sprout is a very popular local Chinese food as many people claim the beans sprout is much larger than the ordinary ones)

- I don't simply give out coins to beggars/uncles/old aunty/granny/etc. anymore as I learnt that these people do not deserve the donations. 1st thing, coins are not useless money. 2nd thing, most of them are still capable of doing other more beneficial things rather than begging by the street and relying on other people.

- I began to realise that saving is really important due to the fact that I get a much lower salary in Ipoh and things are getting more expensive these days. As such, I become a much more thrifty person rather than a big spender.

- Ever since working in Ipoh, I feel that we should think carefully before saying something, because we will never know when will the things we say, offend someone. This is due to the fact that majority of Ipoh people, who coincidentally are Chinese, are very careful people in their speech. Moreover, the Customer Service background of my Ipoh job teaches me to be more careful in speaking.

- No doubt that motorcycles are parking & traffic jam immune, but a simple Chinese verse that my girlfriend, L, told me, made me realise a fact. She said, "For the motorcycle, it's the human who covers the metal. For the car, it's the metal which covers the human. Now tell me, which is safer?" As expected, I couldn't give her an answer.


Which is why now, I'm a bit confused. Have I change to a better man or worse? I remember I heard from someone that a change doesn't mean that it's going to change for the better good. Sometimes a change will make you a worse person than before, sometimes a change will make you change your original personality and wreck the h*ll out of you.

I still remember clearly the words I told my parents before I left to Ipoh. I said, "You all look out! I will show some results to all of you; I will succeed in my career, I will also succeed in securing L as my official girlfriend!"


But now...


I have failed everything, and now here I am, back to square one.


Together with the confusion caused due to the sudden spark of change.


There goes my self confidence.


Already so late? Off to bed now. Have a job interview waiting for me later in the afternoon.


Haihz.

a w e s o m e

WARNING : Long post ahead. Crap included. Please be informed & thank you for visiting.

We are .... F . I . R !!!

One word to describe F.I.R concert that I went last Saturday at Genting.


A W E S O M E !


Yes, it was that good until I have to admit it was the BEST concert I've ever been to in my entire life (up to now, that is), even better than Sammi's, even better than S.H.E's, even better than Jay's, OMG!

To cut a long story short, yeah, overall the whole trip was kind of tiring. REALLY tiring (which kinda explains the delay of this post). After packing off all my stuffs before leaving my ex-Ipoh home on Friday, i moved out officially on the same afternoon itself & reached KL by evening. By the time I land my foot at home, not even after breathing some of the much needed 'homely' air, I rushed to take my bath & start unpacking stuffs I don't need in order to clear out the bag for the next day trip to Genting for F.I.R concert.

Next day, off I go to Genting with both my parents. Wait a minute, WTF?! Both my parents? What in the world are they following me up to Genting for F.I.R? No, actually they're just joining me to go up Genting as my dad claim they have some 'Magic Mirror' play a.k.a 'Kuan-Yin-wannabe-&-co-live-in-a-play-kinda-thing' showing in Genting at the same time as well. Oh well, no harm done, moreover initially I have no place to stay in Genting anyway...now that my parents, aunty, cousin bro & grandma (notice the number of family members who followed me up to Genting, zzz..), I get a free place to stay in Resort's World, thanks to my aunty who collected tons & tons of WorldCard points from her 'friendly' casino friends.

Also, I have to sacrifice my own privacy to enjoy the F.I.R concert alone, as I was 'forced' to bring my cousin bro together to the concert. Haihz, & I thought I can finally watch a concert alone, all alone in my own world & no nonsense, no need to feel shy & 'pai seh' especially if you're shouting Faye's name like some insane lunatic or if you're on 'high' mode after hitting on some fast tunes. Also, you can have the ultimate flexibility to take your own sweet time to come early to the concert 1 freaking hour earlier & go back to your hotel room 1 hour after the concert & no one will say a thing. Haihz....I miss my lovely loneliness. When shall I see you again, my dear 'friend'?

One more thing...check out the difference between the 2 pictures below, and tell me which one looks better.

This one,


or this one?

Obviously the latter looks SO MUCH better, right? As expected, the first pic came from my good ol' lousy Canon Powershot A460 camera who keeps 'auto-shutdown-due-to-forever-low-battery-regardless-of-whether-using-new-battery-or-not' & 'it-takes-forever-to-recharge-the-flash-after-each-shot', and the second pic, oh well, taken by pro photographers using DSLR's who are either rich fellas forking a few more hundred bucks for the VIP seats or media staffs who, well, obviously use high-tech DSLR in which the lens are as thick as 10 roti canai's stacked together & is freaking long & hard enough to knock someone (or should I say, anyone? ) unconscious. I wouldn't say everyone at the VIP area uses DSLRs', but if I ever get myself a seat there too, I guess I can take a picture much nicer than the first pic above. Seriously.

Anyway, they deserve the credit for taking such nice & insanely professional pics for us mere humans to savor, and here comes the credit list for the nice pics posted here :

http://www.myfirclub.com (Member - ahloon)
http://www.kwongwah.com.my
http://imnotthatskinny.blogspot.com/2008/11/fir-arena-of-stars.html
http://crystalismz.blogspot.com/2008/11/fir-live-in-malaysia.html

For the pleasure of viewing, here are the lousy pics I've taken during the concert. Yeah, they are kinda lousy, blur, shaky & unprofessional, but hey, it was taken by me myself on a crappy camera & on a PS2 seat area. Which makes me d*mn proud as I've been to an F.I.R concert! w00t!~ And yeah, just in case you took /copied any of my lousy pics here, please provide the link back to my site. A little credit is more than enough, thanks in advance.

View from my seat at the concert.

Planets? Hanging here in Genting? WTF?

Ugly Malaysians being late for the concert...as usual.

1st song & you're already facing your back to me, Faye? I'm hurt!

Real a.k.a Ah Ching doing the thing!

Sometimes rockstars do get tense like us, hmm.

Stoning & cooling down for the moment.

Still stoning? Well, maybe they are too tired with all the casino activities last night.

"Use Rexona & clear off unpleasant smells!"

Faye doing acoustic...& gosh, her voice kills!

We are F.I.R...err, where's Ian?

Faye singing some high tune part...really professional voice controlling!

Hey Faye, I'm here! You're blowing the kiss at the wrong direction!

Thank you Malaysia...emo betul.

Ian shouts "My mic for sale!!! Going once..."

& now....the nice, professional pics which are taken by other people. But still...they're nice! Credits mentioned as per above.

Oh gosh, still high even after returning back home. Oh well, need to start returning to reality and face the cruel fact to look for another job. Haihz, reality hurts.

This concert is definitely worth it.