c o o l d o w n

Happy New Year 2011 !

Ohhhh, the new year is finally here to remind me that time is ticking off fast, and like it or not, another 365 days from 2010 have just been wasted. What achievements have been accomplished? What is yet to be completed? What new resolution is up for this new year? Frankly speaking, I'm not a "resolution" kind of person. In fact, I hate them. Why is that? It's because I feel the more resolution I put ahead for myself, the more remorse and regretful I will get by the end of this year because I won't be able to get any of the resolutions up & accomplished. It's not that I'm thinking from the negative perspective or looking at things the wrong way, but that's the way it is. So much I said I hate planning for something, yet I still need to plan to get some things done. But definitely not for resolutions. Never ever.

And as I'm posting this up, I'm currently "hiding" away from civilization, far away from the cruel corporate, metal-filled metropolitan city of Kuala Lumpur. I'm currently on long leave at my maternal grandmother's place before starting off my new job. Well, let's just treat this "long leave" as a minor time gap between the last working day of my previous job and the first day of my upcoming new job. I tend to have this habit of leaving at least 3 weeks to 2 months' time for "cooldown period", a time frame I leave for myself, basically idling and doing nothing. Usually, I'll take the initiative to return to my maternal grandmother's place for around a week or so, to actually slow things running up my head. Well, like it or not, the busy and hectic life of the city is causing my blood pressure to slowly shoot up, my patience slowly losing off, my temper slowly killing off everyone around me, and most importantly, my urge for the annual return back to Terengganu was not materialized last year, which is why I desperately need a dose of small, country style living to actually balance off the amount of nonsense I've accumulated along the way living in this metal-city of KL.

In fact, everytime I return to this place I call my 2nd home (Terengganu is my 1st, KL is my 3rd), everyone I know around here (relatives & friends of my mom) tend to ask me the same old question - "Why does a city guy like you, love to come back to this kind of small town? This place does not have the same atmosphere as your city." Well, I don't actually blame them for asking this kind of question. In fact, if I were in their shoes, I would ask this question too. The answer is simple enough - because I wanted to cool down; slow down from all the hustles and tussles in the city. In fact, what I can say is after studying in Terengganu for 3 long years, it really affect my mentality and my perspective towards village-like, small town life. Last time, I used to think that staying in this kind of village-like environment are boring and hopeless. Now that I finally understand the logic behind it, I get it. This kind of peaceful, stress-free life is exactly the ingredient to make you a happier, and cheerful person. No more grumbling behind the Net-sphere like what I'm doing now, no more hot tempers, no more high blood pressure, no more bad health. It's all just slow and steady at this kind of place.

My aunty, who is running a small insurance agency at this place, asked me a very random question a few days ago. She asked whether I would be interested in the insurance field, as she's planning to handover her whole business here to me, if I'm really interested. I was speechless for a moment, and then I answered her in a gentle tone :

"Anything is possible. I will definitely let u know when the time comes."

Why that uncertain answer? For myself, I take that as a very certain, definite answer. Because I might take up the offer and live at this small town for the rest of my life. Who knows? My passion towards village-like life is deep; very deep indeed, but no one shall understand this fact besides myself. Let it be then.

As I'll be leaving this place tomorrow to return to the big city, I shall treasure and appreciate the past whole week I've spent at this place, reminiscing, looking back, and freeing myself from troubles' & headaches accumulated along the way.

Goodbye, my dear grandmother. I shall see you again later during Chinese New Year.