Tuesday, November 27, 2007

l i f e

Study, work, retire, die.


.


..


...


Is this the destiny that every human have to face in their lives?


This question came out of the blue when I was working today. A very serious, logical question, fresh from the brain of a depressionist. Ironic, isn't it? I suppose to imagine when my pathetic life will come to a better tomorrow, yet this question totally blew everything out.


God (if there is ever one), why do I have to suffer in this life with so much problems and live with such sorrow? I know I'm considered very lucky as compared to other people in this world; I have a perfect human body, no disabilities, a caring family, stable job, friends, an IT degree, my own vehicle, etc.. but why do I still feel sad, sorrow & lost? Is there something I miss along my 23 years of existence in this world? If yes, I don't expect you to come down here & tell me straight to the face.


Just....


...


..


.


Return my soul to me.


Return my joy & appreciation for life.


Return...


...


..


.


My life.

2 comments:

pelf said...

Many times, the person INSIDE the house doesn't realize how big or small his house is. But the moment he steps OUTSIDE the house, he sees it.

Many times, we search for that "lost" thing in our lives, but if only we don't cling too tightly on it, we may be able to see that it has NEVER been lost. It's just that we are too depressed to actually feel it.

Stop and smell the roses, sai lou :)

evelyn tea said...

Hi Jian...

You will have better days to come, I am sure of that. Just hang on in there, k?

This is your defining moment, as sometimes we need to go through an incomprehensible times of sorrow, brokenness and depression (and confusion - i get that all the time) to realize what makes us. It is something within us that will carry us through life which will also make us 'seasoned'- only which we will know when the fever of life settles down and when we take a broader sense of take in life.

Take care my friend... I may come down to kay-el end this year. We'll meet up and chat silly- just like we used to.

(p/s: there is God, always have been.. and I am sure he does know why you ask such questions and he cares, more than I possibly can)